Saturday, April 10, 2010

Birthday Wishlist

Dear Mom,

Remember how you helped me make my first birthday wish list when I was going to turn three? Add thirty more years to that number and what do you get? An expert birthday wish list writer! With three growing children and their wishes to cater too, I hardly find time to think about what I want. A week before my birthday, however, I think of all that I really crave and very obediently pen it down on paper and send it to you. Because ma, nobody has ever really cared about what I want more than you.

Here goes the list:

1. Golden Pixie Dust: We both know how incomplete my life is without it! I wish I had some golden pixie dust which I could sprinkle all around me and things would magically set themselves right. Golden pixie dust; which would enable me to fly high towards the skies and kiss the rainbow and stretch out and lie down on the white fluffy clouds. Even if just for a while. And then when I run out of all the magical dust, I wish I had some more!

2. A chocolate house: Imagine all the cooking it would save me! And it had better be in a cool place, where the chocolate does not melt. I don’t want to spend all my time cleaning up the mess left behind by molten chocolate. And the chocolate had better be the good nutritious kinds. I know my kids are going to never tire of licking those kind of walls. And let the topping please be primarily strawberry. I like the heady smell of strawberry and cocoa. Oh and in Anshika’s room, please have a gem plastered wall. That girl is crazy about gems. Oh and I don’t mind a cocoa bath. My masseur tells me its heaven for the skin! Do we have to pay a house tax for chocolate houses?

3. Glass Slippers: The kinds which Cinderella had? I wish I had a pair of those. A pair which would fit only me and no one else. And when I put them on I want to be transformed into this beautiful princess. They would cover my cracked heels and make my feet look like straight out of a shoe advert. And then I wish I misplace one of those and Ravi pulls heaven and earth together to find it for me.

4. Mice Friends: The ones who would scamper around and gather things for me! When I am exhausted and fall dead on the bed, they would clean and cook, just to surprise me! And they would sit and hear me dole out my woes and come up with imaginative fairy tale solutions. Wouldn’t that be perfect? Oh please ensure plague free mice. I just cant handle any medical expense at this point! And think about the children??!

They seem like such simple wishes, don’t they ma?

I wish you were here with me. Anshika tells me one of her fairy tales explains that when a special human being dies, he or she goes to heaven to become God’s special fairy.

You are very special ma. So when I come to heaven I am going to look around for the most beautiful fairy and in her arms I know I will find all my wishes come true.

Till then its back to baking scones for a girly tea party!

Miss you.

- Me

Wednesday, April 7, 2010


Once a woman turns thirty it is quite catastrophical. The world suddenly jumps and starts spinning on a different axis. There are a whole new set of expectations to live up to and the ones that you have gotten used to delivering don’t count anymore.

At least in the mind of the woman who has just turned thirty.

She turned thirty today and she felt the brunt of being thirty. She felt old, jaded and unappealing. Thirty years of her life had passed by in a blur and all she had to show for it was her office id announcing her as the Assistant Manager of her firm. Oh and the big fat gold band which rested on her ring finger.

Romance in her life was dead. Buried under five years of planning, scrounging and some more planning. She sighed and tapped her mouse aimlessly. Why did romance walk out on relationships?

“Hey dreaming glory!” Rekha demanded her attention. “Look what just came in for you!”

She turned around to face the perfect crimson-kissed velvet bouquet she had ever seen. About a hundred roses, molded from romeo’s bleeding heart, arranged themselves cheek to cheek to cheek. Enchanting dew shivered delicately on the wine drenched petals.

“Oh my god!” she whispered. Words could never describe the strange sensation pulsating through her.

“Beautiful right?” Rekha smiled wistfully. She nodded.

“Are you sure its for me?” She asked unable to take her eyes off the bouquet.

Rekha flipped the tiny card hanging from the delicate satin binding the bouquet. “Happy Birthday Tarangana!” She read from the card. “Yep its for you!” She announced grinning.

Tarangana snatched the card from her and read it again. “It does not say who it is from,” she noted.

“Who cares?” Rekha grinned. “For a bouquet like that, I am ready to turn thirty for every single day of the rest of my life!”

Tarangana grinned too. “But its curious, who would send me a bouquet?”

“Your husband?”

“The last time he gave me a flower was…. Wait! He has never given me flowers! He think they are a complete waste of money. Why spend on something which withers away in three days. There is no investment value…”

“Stop!” Rekha pleaded dramatically. “Don’t stab the romance out of this heartbreaking beauty! Ok! I get it! Your husband did not send you the bouquet.”

“Who then?”

“Maybe you have a secret admirer in office!” Rekha offered excitedly. They did a quick sweep of the office, then looked at each other and shook their heads. Nobody in office was either romantic or creative. “Maybe its someone you met online.”

Tarangana chewed on her lower lip and thought about it. Had she shared her office details with any of her online acquaintances? Was she close enough to someone, for them to have taken the effort to remember her birthday and send her flowers? She thought for a couple of seconds and then shrugged. No one came to mind.

“You know you cant take the flowers home,” Rekha said wisely, still eyeing the bouquet.

“Why not?”

“What are you going to tell you husband? That someone gifted you a hundred red roses, but you don’t know who? Yeah I can very much see him believe that!”

Tarangana scowled.

“He will just think you are cheating on him and insulting his intelligence by feeding him foolish lines like ‘I don’t know who gifted me a hundred roses!’ Think woman. Think! It does not take much for a man to be jealous. Do you want to ruffle feathers, when you don’t even know who sent you the roses! Yours will be the first marriage rocked by an anonymous!”

“You’re right,” Tarangana sighed. “its wise not to take the roses home.”

“Isnt it Tarangana’s birthday today?” Lokesh asked as he downed his beer. He nodded and took a swig from his own mug. “Then why are we sitting on the bar stools of a rather empty bar, guzzling beer? Shouldn’t we be out with her?”

“We fought,” he spat.


“For the past five years, all she has done is nagged me for being unromantic!” He complained.

“So do something romantic then!”

“I did.”

“I sent her a hundred red roses!”

“What?!” Lokesh was completely baffled. “Dude, don’t you ever get romantic again. Please. You are raising the bar for the rest of us married guys!”

“What’s the point?”

“What do you mean by ‘what’s the point’?”

“She did not even acknowledge it. Not once! Not even a thank you!” He thumped his empty beer mug loudly on the table. The bartender hastened to refill it.

“That’s impossible!” Lokesh claimed. “Maybe she didn’t receive it.”

“That’s what I first thought. So I checked with the delivery boy. He assured me it was delivered.”

“Then why?”

“Beats me,” he mumbled. “I thought maybe she was waiting to thank me personally. You know, have a kinky surprise waiting for me when I got home?”

Lokesh waited patiently for him to continue.

“When I got home, she told me there were still people in the world who believed turning thirty was not the end of a romantic phase of someone’s life and that I was the most unromantic man she had ever met!”

Lokesh shook his head and patted him on the shoulder.

“I did not want to stand there and fight with her on her birthday,” he continued. “So I walked out!”