Monday, March 24, 2008

Black for this evening

She stood at the window watching the city pulsate with activity and smiled at the irony that spread before her. It was like a glorious painting – dazzling lights across an ink black sky. Overwhelming, but lifeless. Busy minds calculating figures all the while, governed hearts which had placed emotions under lock and key and tucked them away in some such corner, that if they started to look they would never find.

She took a sip of her coffee and wrinkled her nose in disgust. Just how long had she been standing there? Her coffee had turned cold and the layer of cream which had settled on top scowled at her for disturbing its peace. She turned away from the window and made her way to the kitchen. She poured out the coffee in the sink and let the tap run on a very thin stream, so that she may rinse her mug. Her ears were trained to pick up the first strains of her ring tone. But her mobile stayed stubbornly silent.

She was exhausted from work and was glad to be home early. She thought she would put her feet up and just catch up with friends and simply do nothing. It would be her evening. With a beat in her voice she had called almost everybody she had known –

“Hiya!”
“Hey there! Have heard from you after such a long time! How have you been?”
“Good! Just been hard at work, you know…”
“Of course, I understand.”
“Listen, I was just wondering if we could catch up over dinner or coffee maybe?”
“I would love to! But you know how it is… the baby just wont stay without me. And Ashish will be absolutely livid if he finds both of us missing when he gets home… could we push it to the weekend or something?”

If it was not the baby, then the husband, but everybody had somebody they belonged to, somebody they felt responsible for… Someone to come home to. Nobody walked into a well-decorated flat to find themselves alone in a city which housed millions. Except her. The vibrant dynamic corporate at work, who led a disillusioned personal life. If she was not a part of a group she was nobody.

Alone, desolate with only the view from the window to keep her company.

She switched on the idiot box and flipped through the channels, knowing already that nothing would hold her interest. She finally settled on ‘Travel and Living’. Doing what she least wanted to do, she fetched her nail-polish remover. As she eyed her colourful collection of glitzy paints, she definitely decided it was to be black for her nails for this evening…

16 comments:

me in love said...

oh yes.. i love painting black, too...

this is wonderful, and so true..
how many times, have we dialled familiar numbers, only to find ppl busy? and how many times ppl have dialled my number, and I am busy... :(

*sigh*

i love the lil details you put in..

Beauty and the BEast said...

@me in love - and I love writing because you always have such warm reactions!!

Thanks!

marvin the paranoid android said...

we dial numbers, and people are busy... if people are not busy then they deal in double standards... and those you know to not be dealing in double standards let you down when you need them most... those who do not let you down are ditched by you for some or the other reason... human race seems to be cursed that way, there is a vicious circle which stops us from being natural in any relationship... and that is why in our heart we are always alone... and i am yet to find one person who can truthfully, sincerely say otherwise...

me in love said...

@marvin...you have said sth true, thoug i didn't understand double - standard wala funda...

n no, I am not alone in my heart...anyhow, anytime...

Ricky said...

Is this fiction or taken from real life? Its beautifully expressed...

AakASH!!! said...

Well written!

Loved reading through it, and though its a womans perspective on loneliness. It holds true.

the last line was amazing.

Beauty and the BEast said...

@marvin I suppose acknowledging that bite of reality (as you will stress it is) still does not stop one from wishing they were not alone

Beauty and the BEast said...

@ ricky

Does it really matter? If it is fiction you might ingnore it, if it is real you will feel sad and wonder who the woman was...

I think its enough knowing that every now and then all of us feel lonely.. lost, perhaps?

Beauty and the BEast said...

@aakash!!!

Thanks for droppin in!!

And glad you found something you could read :)

marvin the paranoid android said...

@ beauty
sometimes i do wish i was alone... an island, if i remember your words correctly...

Roshni said...

very true..a feeling we all go thru some point in our life's ..
but common'..she shud..paint her nails a bright pink..put up a beautiful song..loud enough that it immerses her....love her self !! ...cus if ppl are too busy in thr life's ...too bad !!! ;) :)

U know who :)

AakASH!!! said...

Why is the E in BEast capitalised?

marvin the paranoid android said...

@ aakash
good question

@ roshnie
welcome, sweets... and yes, i also thought, why not pink, or purple...

Roshni said...

Thanks fr the warm welcome Marvin :)

Crimson Feet said...

she is familiar, known, somewhere!

and this place is familiar too... i am enjoying my little journey thru this *jungle* :)

Beauty and the BEast said...

@crimson feet

She is your next door girl.. the girl you envy .. and the one who secretly envies you